Site Title✦ ADHD | Autism | Emotional Processing | Trauma Healing ✦

Where neurodivergent minds take flight and sensitive hearts adapt.

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🧠🦋 About — BrainButterfly, HeartChameleon Site Author: Kevin Sarasin ADHD Father. Advocate. Coach. Neurodivergent AF. ⸻ 🦋 Welcome to the Nest Hey, I’m Kevin — a dad, neurodivergent advocate, ADHD coach, and someone who’s had to fight damn hard to be understood in a world that doesn’t slow down for people like me… or my son. This space is personal. It’s emotional. It’s built from lived experience, systemic failures, and the kind of pain that turns into purpose. BrainButterfly, HeartChameleon is more than a blog — it’s a nest for nervous systems like ours. ⸻ 💡 Why I Started This Blog I started this after my son Nash — 7 years old, neurodivergent, bright as the sun — was stabbed at school. Stabbed. And even after everything we’d tried to do right… the system failed him. Again and again. He was bullied, dismissed, emotionally injured, and misunderstood. He was masked, silenced, and told to be someone he’s not. And I saw myself in him. Every day. So this blog was born. 🧡 To share our story. 🧠 To connect with others who are living it. ✊ To advocate for change — in schools, in families, and in society. We are not wired to follow. We are born leaders. We think for ourselves. We were never the problem — we’re just not algorithm-brained like the rest of the world. ⸻ 💬 What You’ll Find Here • Real stories about ADHD, masking, trauma, and parenthood • Tools for families navigating the education system • Resources on emotional processing and generational healing • A raw, no-BS look at what it means to raise — and be — a neurodivergent soul • A space for you to feel less alone ⸻ 🦎 BrainButterfly. HeartChameleon. Our brains are like butterflies: slow processors, fast thinkers, deeply intuitive. Our hearts are like chameleons: adaptive, reactive, sensitive to emotional temperature. This brand is built around a truth many of us live every day: We are not “too much.” We are processing in a world that rarely gives us space to do so.

🧡When My Child Was Afraid to Disappoint Me

By Kevin | BrainButterfly.org

Learning to Parent the Child Who Thinks They Have to Earn Your Love

The other day, my child said something that stopped me in my tracks:

“I don’t want to disappoint you out of fear. And I know you expect me not just to try, but to do it.”

No attitude.

No excuses.

Just honesty — soft, raw, and vulnerable.

At first, I felt a pang of guilt. That’s not the parent I want to be.

But then I realized — this wasn’t a criticism.

It was a gift.

A rare window into how I’m experienced, not just how I see myself.

Belief vs. Pressure

I believe in my child deeply.

I see them — how smart, sensitive, and capable they are.

Sometimes, because I see so much light in them, I expect a lot.

But they took that belief and turned it into pressure.

They thought that trying wasn’t enough — that I needed them to succeed.

Not because I punished. Not because I was harsh.

But because neurodivergent kids feel everything more intensely.

They interpret disappointment as failure.

They turn expectations into heavy emotional weight.

Rewriting the Message

So I said the words they needed to hear — the words I wish I’d said sooner:

“I love you no matter what — whether you do the thing or not.

I’m proud of you for who you are, not just what you do.

You don’t have to earn that from me.

You already have it. Trying is enough. Asking is always okay.”

That’s the message I want stitched into their nervous system.

Not “be strong.”

Not “figure it out.”

Not “you’ve got this.”

But “you’re already enough — right now.”

For the Kids Who Feel Too Much

This is for every child who’s ever felt they had to perform to be loved.

Who took a parent’s belief in them and turned it into quiet fear.

We can still believe in our kids. We should.

But we have to remind them — again and again —

that we love them, not for the things they do,

but for who they are when they’re tired, messy, scared, or still learning.

🦋 Because no matter how itty bitty their butterfly brain might feel in a world full of noise… to me, it’s the biggest thing there is.

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